So ladies, I interviewed over 100 guys asking them what they could not stand about a girl on a first date, or on any date for that matter. Here is 71 habits (straight from their mouths!) to avoid when trying to meet your special someone.
· When you’re late; This includes leaving them waiting outside you’re door while you finish applying your makeup or making sure you packed everything in your purse.
· When you can’t make a decision. Don’t be afraid to tell him where you want to or don’t want to eat, go, do, etc. He appreciates not having to decide everything and hope you secretly don’t hate his decisions!
· Can’t hold a conversation. Nothing is more frustrating than trying to get to know somebody when all of their answers are “yes” or “no.” Leave the conversation open when he tries to ask you something by giving answers that allow him to jump in and relate to, or disagree even.
· Talk about yourself too much. Only talking about your achievements, hobb
ies, work, school, etc., is not holding a conversation. He doesn’t care about you’re friends’ drama, like how Kristina hooked up with Nancy’s ex-boyfriend then Nancy found out and now you’re stuck in the middle and don’t know what to do, etc. Let him talk about himself as well, besides, some things are worth saving for later dates!
· Texting or Talking on the phone! Every guy interviewed said that this was an
absol
ute deal breaker. Nothing is more annoying and rude than constantly playing with your phone, especially at the dinner table. If you can, leave the phone in the car so you’re not tempted to text. For some it may be a nervous habit, but try to find something else to calm those nerves. If you absolutely have to take a call, then excuse yourself to the restroom for a minute but don’t leave him waiting while you are listening to Gabby’s 15 minute story of what happened to her at the bar last night.
· Not dressing accordingly or “nicely.” Always dre
ss to impress! A guy once said that he showed up to a girl’s place to take her out and she was dressed like she just came back from the gym! Find out where you are going and check the dress code in order to look your best. Unless you’re first date is going hiking, leave the sneakers in the closet.
· Doesn’t smell good. Just make sure to wear deodorant and some nice perfume.
· Talk about Ex-Boyfriends. Repeat after me, “I WILL NOT BRING UP MY EX…I WILL NOT BRING UP MY EX...I WILL NOT BRING UP MY EX.”
· Poor table manners. This includes being on your phone, chewing with your mouth open, not wiping your hands and mouth, knowing how to use utensils, and not talking while you have food in your mouth.
· No sense of humor. Don’t be afraid to let him see your funny bone ladies. All first dates are awkward, so what’s better than to laugh it off together? Just don’t laugh at things you know aren’t funny, guys
also notice this and find it unattractive.
· Doesn’t make eye contact. Nothing lets a guy know that you’re not interested more than looking everywhere else when either of you are engaging in conversation.
· Not willing to try different things. Try to be as open as possible to nontraditional date ideas or restaurants. If he recommends a Thai place and you have never tried it, why not?
· No opinion of her own. Don’t be afraid to disagree with him! If you feel a certain way about something
, let him know. No one wants to date a sheep.
· Not willing to dance. If he wants to take you out on the dance floor don’t be the wallflower. Don’t be afraid to show him your moves, or lack thereof! Have a good time!
· Don’t be annoying. Easy enough?
· Expect the typical first date. I found it interesting that guys actually don’t care for the standard dinner and movie on the first date. If you can, try and think of an activity where you can get to know one another besides the awkward table talk. Also, going to the movies when you don’t really know the person is also uncomfortable. Agreed?
· Uninteresting conversation. Try and find other interests to talk about other than the typical “Where do you go to school?” “So, what do you want to be when you ‘grow up?’”
· Pretend to be interested. He knows when you’re not genuinely into what he’s saying, so don’t think you’re doing him a favor. Besides, if you aren’t interested, why would you want him to continue on the subject anyway?
· Awkward silence. Being a little shy is cute, but try and find things to talk about to fill this awkward silence. Just be careful to not make it seem like you are filling this void.
· Showing insecurities. Hey, everyone has them. Don’t be the girl who constantly needs reassurance that she’s not overweight, or pretty. Also, don’t pull the “do you think she’s pretty?”
· Talk about marriage and/or kids.
· Talk about your issues or problems. He doesn’t need to know your financial problems or health issues just yet, or your family’s and friends’.
· Talk about how “rad” you are. He doesn’t care about how you get in everywhere for free or what other kind of hook ups you get. Unless, he is using you.
· Expect them to pay. He is already planning on paying for you, but he ap
preciates it if you at least pretend you were going to pitch in.
· When you act feminist. Let him open the door for you, let him pay for you, let him be a gentleman. Be thankful that these guys still exist!
· Takes it too seriously. Don’t let him know you are already thinking about a future with him. Just let go, have fun, and see where it goes.
· Expect too much on the 1st date. First dates are awkward and nerve-wracking for the both of you. Give him a chance to bring more to the table and “wow” you later.
· Talk about MySpace, Facebook, or Twitter. He doesn’t need to know how many friends or followers you have, or that you know exactly how many he has.
· Doesn’t enjoy listening to music or singing in the car. Don’t be shy, if you love the song then let him know! What a great segue into conversation about favorite music.
· Asks too many questions. Don’t make him feel as if he is applying for job. Give him a chance to share what he feels comfortable with.
· Doesn’t enjoy playful pre-date or post-date texting. Nothing wrong with flirting a little to break the ice. Just be careful you don’t say anything you don’t plan on following through with.
· Fake. Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not. It’s okay to not like superhero or gory movies, sports, or anything else that he’s into or you think he expects you to be like.
· Say you voted for Sarah Palin. A guy said a girl actually said this to him. Make sure to do some research if you plan on talking about topics you aren’t familiar with.
· Put up a wall. Everone is afraid of getting hurt, but don’t make it seem impossible for him to get to know you.
· Try to impress him too much. No one likes people who brag. Don’t make him feel like you are out of his league.
· Pretend you don’t eat. Guys can’t stand when they take you out to dinner and all you order is a side salad or you only eat about 2 bites of your entrée.
· Act a tease. Don’t lead him on or let him think he is going to get something you don’t plan on giving.
· Inability to interact. Don’t just listen to what he has to say, engage in the conversation. Don’t make him keep having to ask you questions in order to know what your voice sounds like. If you happen to meet his friends, try your best to get to know them and have fun. Don’t let them refer to you as “quiet girl.”
·
When you burp or fart. Not attractive.
· Talk about who you know that’s famous. Name dropping just comes off as annoying and desperate to guys. It also makes them feel like they wont fit into your lifestyle.
· Doesn’t say thank you. Make sure you always thank him for the date. Guys like to know their effort is appreciated, but don’t thank them so much where it sounds like you have never been taken out before.
· Leave the flowers he bought you in his car. This actu
ally happens, so make sure you remember to grab everything at the end of the date. Leaving gifts behind makes you look unappreciative.
· Doesn’t drink/loosen up a bit. Have a drink, it will help calm your nerves a little.
· When you get sloppy drunk. There’s a huge difference between having a couple of drinks and getting wasted. Don’t put yourself in a position where you have to depend on someone to take care of you, it’s not fun or safe.
· Talk about past sexual experiences. This isn’t sexy and it makes him feel uncomfortable. He doesn’t want to know how many other guys (or girls!) you have slept with or hear about the time your mom walked in on you.
· Lack confidence. Men love a women who believes in herself. If you think highly of yourself, then he will too.
· Too into your looks. Yes, we all know it take
s a lot of work to be beautiful, but you don’t need to let him know how much work. This includes checking yourself out in every mirror you come across and re-touching your makeup too much. Obviously he already thinks you’re attractive if he is taking you out!
· Ask too many questions about his love life. He doesn’t want to hear about yours, and he doesn’t want you to know about his. Besides, it’s hard to focus on the present and the future if you can’t stop worrying about the past. Right?
· Scrape your teeth. Excuse yourself to the restroom if you think you have some food caught in there!
· Still friends with your Ex-Boyfriend(s). No guy wants to know this! Think about how you would feel if he kept his around.
· Talk about old flames that are mutual friends/acquaintances. Even if he already knows, he doesn’t want to hear that you hooked up with his friend Brad.
· When you check out other guys in front of him. Yes, they pay attention to this.
· When you don’t ask questions about them. Okay, so don’t interrogat
e them, but make sure you are taking an interest.
· Negative attitude. Nothing kills the date faster than being a “Negative Nancy.” Keep an open mind, and if you aren’t having fun suggest something else but keep a positive attitude about it.
· Give it up on the first date. Ever hear the expression, “Why buy the whole cow when you’re getting the milk for free?”
· Talk about money. Don’t talk about how much you make, or ask him how much he makes. You don’t want to sound like a “gold-digger.” Also, he doesn’t need to know if you make more than him just yet.
· Say you don’t kiss on the 1st date. Okay, maybe you don’t. There is nothing wrong with that, but let him think he has something to work for. Instant failure isn’t fun for anyone.
· Try too hard on being “hard-to-get.” Don’t let him think that he’s never going to win. He’s not going to play the game if there is no getting to the next level.
· Complain about everything. Try and find something good about whatever it is you guys are doing. Don’t trash the restaurant, or whatever else he planned for you. He won’t bother taking you out again if he feels like he can’t make you happy.
· Over think. Girls have a known tendency to over think just about everything when it comes to relationships and dating. Try not to start just yet…
· Too shy. Like I said earlier, a little shyness is often cute, but not opening up at all simply comes off boring.
· Sneeze on him. Uh, just make sure to turn your head away and sneeze in the inside of your elbow, not your hands…or on him.
· Make him
meet your parents on the 1st date. It’s best to wait until after a few dates to introduce him to your family. Besides, you might not ever want to see him again anyway.
· Have a certain time the date has to end. Try and choose a day where you don’t have to be anywhere after. This gives you both more time to relax and not feel rushed.
· Chew gum obnoxiously. Okay, you might be doing this out of nervousness, but try taking mints instead so you can avoid this habit altogether.
· Flirt with other guys in front of him. How would you feel if he was hitting on the waitress while you were out to dinner? Try keeping your focus on him and not the other eye-candy in the room.
· Pretend that you’re flawless. EVERYONE has flaws! Nobody is perfect, not even YOU.
· When you dress “slutty.” This definitely relates to dressing to impress. If you dress with your tits hanging out, stomach showing, or your ass practically hanging out, then you are begging not to be respected. You might as well write “EASY” across your forehead.
· When you don’t hold hands. Unless the absolute
idea of this guy repulses you, if he reaches out for your hand, take it. He’s trying to be cute with you, enjoy it while it lasts!
· Impolite to waiters. A lot of people are in the serving business and know how stressful it can be. Even if you feel the server really sucks, give him/her a break. Try not to be too demanding and embarrass your date by asking for a billion things on the side or be a food snob.
· When you bring your kid. Yeah, this isn’t the best way to tell him you have offspring. Even if he already knows you have a kid, find a babysitter. Let him get to know you before overwhelming him with the idea of that extra baggage. No offense, but it’s true.
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